Growing up, I always dreamed of meeting Mr Right. Of falling in love and being incredibly happy. Of living "happily ever after." Isn't that what we learn growing up? The princess always gets saved by Prince Charming. There is always true love.
What I never learned was the importance of my own relationship with myself. I never learned to put myself first, to make myself happy, to be alone. I always felt the need to be with someone. I needed that to be happy.
As I've gotten older, I've learned how skewed my thoughts were. I've learned to make myself happy, instead of relying on others all the time.
Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life by Lauren Mackler is like a how-to guide to being alone, and being happy. It's meant for anyone, those in relationships or not. The book includes self-assessment tools, opportunities for guided writing, and exercises to help you get a new sense of yourself.
Solemate incorporates Mackler's experiences from her background in psychology, physiology, sociology, holistic healing, and strategic business practices throughout the book. An interesting perspective is offered, as Mackler herself had to learn what it was like to be alone after her divorce.
Mackler discusses how changes take time, and effort. It takes commitment and a willingness to change. But, the results are well worth it.
Solemate brings a new way of thinking to the table. It reinforces that being alone can be healthy, and that we don't always need a relationship to be happy. But, the most important idea it brings about is that you have to be happy with yourself. Once you achieve your own happiness, you will see how it transforms your other relationships.