Today hubby brought up the idea of me going back to work. The little one will be starting kindergarten in the fall, and it seems that I am expected to find a job then.
Here's the thing about me: I hate being told what to do by anyone. Maybe it's the 5 year old in me, but being told to do something makes me want to do the exact opposite. I need it to by my decision, when I'm ready.
Granted, I went to college and finished up my degree while he worked. He took full responsibility of earning the money for awhile, but I've done the same for him when he was unemployed. The thing is, I like being at home. I want to be here to send my son off to school, I want to pick him up in the afternoon, I want to be that mom.
I just don't see the balance being there anymore. If that makes any sense. I'm fighting the idea of being away from my little one for a huge part of the day, and wanting to make the most out of the time we will see each other. It's so hard for me to see my little one suddenly seeming so grown up.
Any advice? How did you handle you kids going off to school for the first time?
10 comments:
Hello There! Amen Sister! I struggle with the same thing all the time - and I think most of it is self-induced pressure. I went to grad school for Pete's sake! But, guess what? I don't want to sit in rush hour or go to boring meetings, unless it's my decision. Is that selfish? My kids are 5,3, and 2. I'd like to build up a freelance writing business between now and the 2 year old going to kindergarten, so I can set my own hours. My Mother Venture (also Networking Venture) group lets me earn a little money on the side too...hang in there...
There may be an option. When I was a retail manager I had an employee who opened for me and worked through everyone else's lunch shift. She got to drop her children off at school, pick them up for school and still work a small part time job to take some money home. I'm hoping I can get a gig like that when mine are all finally in school.
It was tough for about the first week. Then everything was heaven! It was nice to have "me time" for once, getting housework done without tripping over a toddler, scheduling shopping around naps, etc. I had one year of freedom before we decided on number 2. To be honest, I'm quite content with the idea of spending the rest of my life as a housewife. At some point after the kids are all in school I may go back to college, but that's still in the air.
I totally get that! I was supposed to go back to work when my oldest was 6 mo old but I just couldn't do it. So my hubs and I both decided that I should stay home. I've had a couple small jobs here and there but only when my hubs could be home with the kids. I've tried everything....Shaklee Rep., opening my own business, babysitting...you name it. All I want is enough money to be comfortable so I don't have to work. Not rich...just comfortable. I want to be home when my kids get home. I want to be the room mom in the class for my kids. I dont ever want to say, 'sorry honey, I can't be at your party/practice/recital/game, etc b/c I have to work.'! I want to be home with them. I had my kids and I want to be there for them. Maybe if you could do something like medical transcriptioning or a small cleaning job so you could be home the rest of the time and/or make your own schedule! Good luck!
Hmmm. Think about easing into it. is there a way you could work part time? Can you do consulting? If you can control the schedule it will make like much easier.
Maybe you can make a compromise and start babysitting for cash. Honestly if your not wanting to get out and get a part time job there are other alternatives. I know a website that has a lot of great links to legitimate at home business. If ya want the link let me know. its full of sites that you can apply to be a phone operator for hotels like Disney, etc, type from home, etc. I am a mom of four and I now will welcome an escape from this madness called my home.
I have a few years before I am in your shoes but I imagine I will feel similiar. I can't imagine how hard that will be. Maybe you can decide after he goes back to school?
It was hard when they started school, but going back to work was hard for me as I didn't have anyone to look after kids for me, and also it's hard when they get sick, where do they go if you are working, like today my daughter was very sick and didn't go to school. It was and is a big sacrifice financially but we have managed. But now I work from home, would that be an option for you?
To be honest - if I could stay home, I would. I think that would be such a special way to bond with my kids. But the money would be very nice too. Maybe you could find a job at the school - that way you would have the same hours, vacations as the school?
I think about this a lot. I don't know what I'm going to do when they are all in school. I really want to be that Mom that is always home when the kids need me...but on the other hand it would be nice to have that extra dough. Luckily I have a few years to think about it.
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